Wednesday, June 08, 2005

Why your chili sucks ...

Pappa Happa was kind enough to send a couple of Sherpas up to the Lou with a couple of quarts of Casper's chili. I learned a few things:

You cannot eat a quart of chili in one sitting, even if it is your birthday.

Casper's chili travels remarkably well; even with a freezing thrown it, it was still pretty good.

The secret of good chili is simplicity itself. People ruin chili without even trying. For one thing, they put tomatoes in it. This is a huge mistake. The acid is unneeded and the mushy vegtable texture is jut plain gross. Chili is meat (and i think the secret to Springfield's best chili is the cheap, cheap hamburger they use. When the fat melts away into the gestalt, the remaining meat fiber is toothsome) and beans and spices. That's pretty much it. Keep your green peppers and chunks of onion out. There's no need for anything fancy: a cubed-steak and black bean chili with roasted vegtables will never, ever be as good as a decent roadhouse bowl with some saltines or, even better, a grilled cheese for dipping.

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